All About The Swim Wear.

 

All Swim Suits- Albion Fit, 

Blue Kimono, White Floral Kimono

We just got back from a little spring break getaway to Mexico. We've been going to Rocky Pointe since I was about 12, so it was fun to take the kids with us this time. I felt olllddddd hanging out at the kid pool. Times have changed since we would go spend our college spring breaks down there :)

The links to my swim suits and kimonos are above and below. I am on a kimono kick and wear them daily, and also to the beach! I found some very affordable options for ya. Hope you're having a great weel/

Spring Ready.

I am so excited for spring! I can not believe that it's already March. March in Arizona means that we're currently experiencing weather that most people get during their summers. Its my favorite time of the year and I'm ready to transition to my spring wear. There's a fun new app that that can help you discover new looks and items.

WEAR allows you to easily discover amazing fashion inspiration on your phone, and then make the purchase or see where you can buy the items that are being worn. WEAR brings the best fashion together, and you can follow me on it here!

Go download the app here and start discovering new looks.

Happy Thursday!

The Art Of Being Happy in a World That's Not

                                  Dress- LuLaRoe by Karlie (she always has new styles to grab)

Photography by: Eunice

I don't want the title of this post to deceive you. It's 11:25 in the morning, the day is not even close to being over, and I've already had a handful of events that have caused some internal anxiety. In fact, last night my husband was getting tired and said let's go to bed. I turned to him abruptly and exclaimed, "No! I can not face that right now! Going to bed means having to wake up tomorrow morning to start the craziness all over again, and I am just not ready to do that right now. Right now, I just need to sit here, and have you rub my feet and do nothing!" So, my good husband did just that because he knows when I am in a mood not to contest anything even if I am not saying rash things. My feet were rubbed and I sat for a while longer and then said, "Okay, I am now ready for bed."

I needed to throw out that behind the scenes visual because I don't want to trick you and make you think that I inhale sunshine and sparkles and confetti every morning for breakfast and then blow it out throughout the day, prancing around like I'm at Disneyland without a care in the world. 

One time, actually a couple of years ago, a not so happy anonymous reader emailed me and said,

"STOP BLOWING SUNSHINE OUT OF YOUR A**!!!"

I couldn't figure out what they were referring to, maybe that I think everything should be perfect all of the time? Because obviously the person offended hadn't ever fully read anything I write about how I am disheveled and burn every dinner ever and cry from time to time about the sad things I see everyday in the lives of people I love, and the list goes on. And then I thought how cool it would be if I could actually blow sunshine....

I've learned something over the years.

People want to be happy, I want to be happy. But sometimes it feels really hard to be. It's hard because of pain and suffering, it's hard because of actions of others beyond our control, it's hard because of injustice and loss and difficult trials not making sense in our minds that can't always comprehend the bigger picture of life. It's hard because of jealousy and envy and gossip and backstabbing and evilness and being pulled in ten directions at the same time.

And in my struggle with trying to make sense of what happiness should look like, I met a woman.

This woman had nothing in the eyes of the world. She lived in government subsidized housing, couldn't go grocery shopping if her food stamps ran out, lost the love of her life decades before, and was at the mercy of others to get her places that she needed to go because she could not drive. 

This woman is one of the happiest people that I have ever met. Because despite her outside circumstances, she chose to be happy on the inside. She chose to be grateful and loving and spent her time serving and uplifting people around her.

I do not claim that I have all of the answers, 

but here is what I have learned about the art of being happy:

- When you are sad, and feel like there is no way to climb out of it, choose to get up and go serve someone else. It is almost impossible to feel unhappy when you are loving and giving to someone who needs it more than you. The art of happiness lies in sharing it with other people. If we worry too much about ourselves, we miss the point of where genuine happiness actually comes from. It's the times where we feel the the worst that we need to go and muster out our best for other people. You'll gripe and moan at first, but when it's over, I promise that you're heart will be full of all those things that you were searching to find all day.

- A lot of people are unhappy, so they will try to make you feel bad about your own happiness. This comes in the form of jealousy of your accomplishments, or trying to stomp your positive attitude down, or gossiping about you... or anything that they can do to make you as miserable as they are.

I have learned a lot of things from these type of people. The first one is that they need love too. I know, it's hard and one time I actually wanted to punch someone square in the face for something that they said to me. Knock on wood but I haven't actually done that to anyone... yet ;) There's a reason they are unhappy, sometimes it goes deep and we have no idea the battles they  have fought and how hard it is for them to just keep on marching. So remember that, and find it in yourself not only to love them, but to let them know that you love them. Another thing I have learned is that no matter what you do, there will always be a critic to say something about it. Laugh it off, brush it off, or as my girl Taylor says... "Shake it off". Sometimes that's the only answer... run away from the negativity and don't give it anymore attention than it's already taken from you. The art of being happy lies in loving and shaking things off.

-You can't save the whole world, but you can sure have a drastic affect on the lives of those around you. Like I said in the beginning, I was feeling a little down and out this morning. Then out of nowhere, I got a message from someone I met years ago saying how something I did back then has now helped play a role in her daughters life, and she thanked me. When we live in a world where children are starving and abuse is rampant and every bad thing exists, it's very easy to be weighed down by the fact that we alone can't change everything. The art of being happy in an unhappy world lies in understanding that it's not your responsibility or ability change it all, but that you can have a positive influence in the sphere of people around you.

- Someone once told me something that I have never forgotten. Which is a big deal because I honestly can't remember what I ate for lunch yesterday.... In fact... I don't know if I remembered to eat anything for lunch yesterday... They said to me, "Ashley, there is no room for unhappiness in a grateful heart." The art of being happy lies in being grateful for the things you have and the experiences that you go through. A couple of years ago I was getting ready one morning and really frustrated with how "bad" my hair looked. I went on Instagram, and happened to see a post of a girl who I had recently met who was diagnosed with cancer. In her picture, she had no hair. My perspective of my so called bad hair day changed, and I became grateful for what I had. Finding gratitude can happen by changing our perceptions of our lives, and focusing on the good that we have in them. 

Be happy. Love those who aren't. And find something every day to be grateful for. 

Lace For A Cause.

 Trench Coat, Lace Dress

We are so excited to be teaming up with 3Claps this week to raise money for scholarships for our student employees. 3Claps specializing in hard to find indie labels for your kids that are so cute and fun. This week, they are donating 10% of sales from the dress and trench coat that Zoe is wearing to our non profit organization. As we grow and employ more first generation college students, it's so important that we keep fundraising and are able to give them all college scholarships. 

**Use code shine project at checkout so that we can get our donation.

On our Instagram @theshineproject, we are also auctioning off this outfit in a size 6-7. 

Share the word with your friends, and thanks for supporting us!

Authentic Love.

I got an email from my grandma that said, "Ashley! You need to write another blog post. I've read your current one so many times that I have it memorized." Hi grandma, thanks for lighting my blogging fire again.  I'm putting more of a focus on blogging again this year, so hopefully writing gaps won't be so long after this.

Tonight Zoe looked at me and said, "Mom, if you weren't my mom and I was older, and I was a boy, I would definitely marry you."

The other day I got home after an incredibly long day. Honestly, weird thing after weird thing kept happening and when I finally got home I felt like I just exited a tornado. 

The tornado of life, it just whirls so dang fast sometimes I'm not sure how to keep up. Sometimes I try to fight against it, and other times I just let it swoop me up until it decides to float me back out.

Anyways, I got home and my sweet Zoe could tell after one look at me that I was struggling. Maybe my disheveled hair and mix matched sweats gave it away, I'm not sure. But that girl just ran over to me and flung her arms around my waist and beamed at me with those big 'ol eyes and said 

"I love you mommy!"

And for the first time all day I smiled so big my cheeks could have exploded. 

And that is authentic love, my friends.

I'm lucky to have it.

If You Are A Parent: You Need To Read This.

Shiloh took pictures of me at the park after school today.

"Mom, what would you do if I drop your new camera?"

"Shiloh, don't even ask me those questions. That's not an option."

Today our schedule looked a lot like most days do.

Mike gets up and takes the kids to school (Bless him. He knows I can't wake up early.)

We work at our offices until about 5:30.

I pick up kids from school or my mom's house depending on the day.

We come home and do homework, eat, get ready for bed.

Sometimes it seems so routine and mundane I feel like the small things I do like laundry and tucking in at night and making dinner are just a drop in the bucket that just have to be done but don't affect anything. Sometimes actions as a parent seem unnoticed. I didn't realize all that went into being a mom until I became one… and even now, I don't ever fully know what I'm doing.

I know that you guys aren't fully aware of the affects you have in  your homes, because I hear you.

I read your emails, literally every comment you make on my social media accounts, and I know that you have hard days. I know that you get tired, and frustrated, and feel like your days have gone to crap sometimes and that no one notices the valiant efforts you have made.

I have news for you.

And it comes from my kid. The very people we are trying to live our lives for.

Here's the news:

THE SMALL THINGS WE DO FOR THEM IS WHAT MATTERS.

Right on my table this morning, I saw this.

The things that Zoe chose to write about her dad were these things,

"He helps us get to school on time."

"He taught me to play soccer."

"When I read to him, he is impressed."

"My dad is extra special because he tucks me in at night."

YOU GUYS! My dad us extra special because he TUCKS ME IN AT NIGHT.

Not because of all the wordly things, not because of all the big magnificent things we spend our time trying to become… but he's special because he tucks me in at night.

All of the things that we never think matter, or are a checklist of just to-do's…

are the things that are most important.

You're daily routines are noticed. They are needed by your sweet kids who's lives have been entrusted with you. And with everything you could be doing in the world, what impacts them most are the little moments you choose to spend with them, teach them, and let them know that they are most important.

Our lives are beautiful. And simple. You make an impact.

So when you are driving to school early tomorrow morning, and picking out smashed gold fish from your car seats, and tackling kids to get into baths and cooking another burnt meal,

You are creating a beautiful life for your children, and they feel it.

And you are extra special.

This Is My Year.

photos by Tell The Birds

Shirt- The Shine Project

use code "myyear" for 10% off through the weekend!!!

I'm sitting in my yoga pants on the rainiest day Phoenix has had all season. 

For some reason, almost every year it's warm except for on New Year's Eve and everyone gets stressed out because we're not used to it being below 60 degrees and we're definitely not used to moisture.

It's not anticipated, and it's not expected and the city is on the phone with each other asking 

"NOW what are we going to do tonight?!"

I think that's why everyone likes the idea of a New Year so much. We get to look back on the times it has stormed on our parade throughout the year, get a good laugh because enough time has passed from the initial sting of things, and realize what a blessing all of our trials were because of where we are now.

In 2014 I almost gave up several times. Or, I felt like giving up, but in my heart of hearts knew that I actually wouldn't. 2014 was a tremendous trial and error. It was full of blessings of learning, loss, anxiety and triumph. 2014 set me up for this coming year. Because 2015 is my year. 

It's your year, too. Because we've been prepared for it and can handle trials and set backs better than we used to. It's our year because our path has led us here, and we're about to let ourselves loose.

But there were times where my course and path seemed up in the air.

Here are 5 times I almost gave up in 2014:

Near the beginning of the summer, literally every, single, thing that could fall into place in my life and my business did. My sister worked for me full time during it all, and I remember calling her one day crying saying, "I feel like I'm in a dream. This is all too good to be true, how could everything possibly be this perfect right now?! I hate to say it but I'm actually nervous that it's about to all crash down because this kind of stuff just doesn't happen all at once."

I soon learned that my nervousness was real. I was being prepared for one of the hardest next few months I have ever faced in my life. These months ended up teaching me how strong I am, what my potential is, and how aware God is of me.

1- There was a week this past year that my family and I were all on a work trip together, but also had a major family situation going on that was out of our control. It was a time that had been prayed about for months, counseled on by people who I needed for help, and was a very high anxiety time for all of us. 

Early one morning I woke up in my hotel bed and I couldn't breathe. I emotionally was so stressed, anxious, and upset that physically it was inflicting some of the most pain on me that I have ever felt. For the next few hours I struggled for breathes of air, while my heart burned in a way that it got to a point where I thought I was dying from a heart attack. I've never been consumed by so much fear, and physical and emotional pain as I was in that moment. It was literally destroying me.

The firefighters got to our hotel room, and after a series of tests told me that all my vitals were normal.

How could they be normal. I feel like I am going to die at any moment.

On the way out one of them looked at me and said, 

Have you been under extreme stress lately? I think you're having an anxiety attack.

And so it was. My body couldn't handle the emotional turmoil I was inflicting on myself and it was something that I couldn't control. After that I struggled with figuring out if I can be the type of mom I need to be, run a business, and have the type of crazy life that we do. 

The struggle lasted a very, very long time.

But here I am, and my fear didn't win.

2- We had been talking for several months about partnering with someone and were making plans to have outside help to make The Shine Project explode this coming year. We spent a lot of time on planning and getting things together for something we thought was a good fit at the time.

Long story short, it wasn't a good fit. At the end of the summer I was left to hurry and plan our holiday, try to scrounge up a new website, and figure out the beginning of what 2015 was going to look like for us. One night I got home late and told my husband that I don't think I could work this hard anymore, that I was tired and wondered if it was worth it. He reminded me of why I do this.

I decided to keep pushing through, and a couple months later we had the best holiday season we could have ever anticipated, providing us with what we need to make 2015 the best year yet.

3- For the first half of the year we put most of our time and resources in to a summer of doing custom sorority events and sales. I flew around the country during the summer selling at sorority events, and at one time was gone for 45 days with only a day or two at home during that time. It was tiring, and we were counting on a very high volume of sales. Well, we over projected. During one of the trips was when I had my anxiety attack and I couldn't even work the show, my husband had to. Because the product was custom for the sorority we were selling to, if things didn't sell, we were then left with a lot of product that we paid for. I invision taking a huge wad of cash and flushing it down the toilet crying as you say goodbye. That's what the sorority tour felt like. We did okay, but not good enough to have that be the major thing we focused and planned for all year. I was devastated, I was tired, and I was so frustrated that I didn't know what I was willing to keep sacrificing to keep The Shine Project going.

Since all of my major set backs last year happened in the same time frame, there were moments where I felt like I was going to be consumed by the hurricane of life and I didn't know how to climb out of it.

My little fight in my wouldn't quite. Every time I wanted to, I knew that I actually would never stop pursuing my dreams and goals of what type of company I want to own. 

This has led me to where I am right now.

In my yoga pants.

Excited for 2015.

Excited for the failures I saw last year and the major success that over powered it all.

For the times of learning and growth that made me realize life is just hard. It doesn't matter what you do, it's hard for everyone and sometimes when things are beyond your control you can really feel overpowered. You'll have your moment, and then all will be right with the world again. 

I've learned in 2014. I'm stronger, and I'm trying to be better.

#thisismyyear

Join our community on Instagram and tag #theshineproject #thisismyyear so we can see what you've overcome and what you're going to accomplish in these next 12 months. 

2015 has been waiting for you.